|more grouchoscopes, oh snap!
||[Oct. 18th, 2006|04:39 pm]
The Grouchy Daily Horoscope
Youre known to be headstrong and arrogant, and today's your day! Be a showoffy asshole to everyone you know! You'll end up getting your ass kicked! And then the other signs of the zodiac will point and laugh at you, particularly Leos.
Stubborn is your middle name. But if you decide to be stubborn today, you'll be ballgagged...painfully.
Because of your two faced nature, you'll be deported to Sri Lanka today. Don't make me explain.....just find out on your own. OBEY THE GROUCHOSCOPE.
Stop being such a pussy, and make sure those two-faced Geminis get deported to Sri Lanka.
Your plan for conquering the world...yet again...will fail today. Dont even try, you'll just end up having diarreah. Youre known to be egotistic and vain, just stay home and marvel at yourself in the mirror.
Your ability to be a neat-freak perfectionist will annoy everyone, particularly today. So be a filthy pig if you want to live.
Hopefully you'll be able to actually make a decision today.....one that wont involve blowing up and/or nuking something.
You better hide those condoms before your mom sees them, you buttslut.
You have a love for travelling. Visit Harlem or Compton today, and send back postcards! Hopefully you'll come back....
Try not to think too hard today, you'll pop a blood vessel. So Id tell you to go sit down and relax, but you'll get hemorrhoids. So you're pretty much screwed today.
Today, instead of being the tree-hugging hippie that you usually are.... try to go the opposite way and formulate a plan to trick vegans into eating some meat. Because deep down, you're an evil bastard.
Youre usually known for being emo. But today, be happy. The psychotic kind of "I love Jesus" happy.